Unremembering Ancestral Trauma
Originally posted on substack: here
I’ve recently been seeing so many patterns that feel as deep as my bones. I’ve been writing poems about loneliness as deep as the deepest oceans. When our primary caregivers showed us a certain reality - like a reality where we were on our own - that feeling can’t be positive mindsetted away. It takes deep healing and patience. And our caregivers probably felt that from their parents, and so on so on, for many generations.
So trying to unwrap those knots in our system can feel so vulnerable and tender. Our bodies can feel like we can’t take more heartbreak in our lives, so we create defense mechanisms so we no longer feel those ways anymore. We keep people from knowing us deeply, we push certain relationships away, we stay in relationships and friendships that are unfulfilling, because we don’t want to go through the vulnerability of feeling what we crave most deeply doesn’t exist for us.
So much tenderness is needed in these times. Learning how to mother and/or father ourselves, how to baby ourselves. How to love ourselves into believing we are lovable, believing we are worthy of receiving more than we did in the past. Allowing ourselves to dream up new realities.
These tender parts take so much patience too. New parts of ourselves show themselves and we must parent them patiently, those parts will never be forced into submission. The more we are accepting and loving to them, the more we allow them to be without changing them, the more change is possible. The change that comes from the surrender to the moment, to the care those injured parts need.
May we pray to our ancestors for help in healing the things that are too deep for us to heal on our own.
Creations:
Tomorrow! Dreamers Council San Antonio Meeting, October 22nd 7pm. Are you someone who serving people is part of your dharma? You are a community leader, you create healing for the you communities, or you know that is part of your path.
We will come in circle and see what lessons life is teaching us now. We will have discussion and please bring a journal. Healing ourselves allows us to heal our communities so we will have discussions around the topics of how we can heal ourselves to show up better in our work.
Donation based and suggested donation $25. Please RSVP ahead of time by October 21st. You can message me or email me to rsvp at ariellesheart@gmail.com.
Video: Why Cancel & Woke Culture Don’t Work - People need to discover the truth for themselves. We need to allow people to learn these deeper values themselves to truly prevent history from continually repeating itself and the perpetuation of cyclical violence
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Online Class with me and Jessica Dyer: Connecting with Ancestral Practices When You Don’t have A Strong Family Lineage to Learn From. Join Jessica Dyer and Arielle Yoon as they discuss our own journeys of connecting with Ancestors when we do not have specific family lineages practices that feel strong enough to draw from. This is an important topic in modern day as we navigate around cultural appropriation and where to look when we don’t have specific guidance.
This workshop can be helpful if you are:
Of mixed descent, Global North descent, or of ancestry who have faced assimilation and therefore you feel disconnected from ancestral reverence practices
Wanting guidance but do not want to culturally appropriate
Looking for more guidance of how to do more ancestors work and connect with land-based practices
Resources
Dandelion Tea - there are many substitute coffee brands that are dandelion tea. I’ve been trying the one by Banyan Botanicals but I want to try the Dandy Blend next. I have been noticing beneficial effects from drinking it every morning though it can be drying so make sure to drink a lot of water and with electrolytes!
When I started my gut healing journey a few years ago, I learned (which seems maybe I should’ve known) how important it is to stay regular with bowel movements. This can be a major contribution to hormonal imbalance! So I’m a lot more mindful of my routine making time for bowel movements (Okay this may not be the content you came here for, but remember healing is emotional, physical, and spiritual- everything is connected! haha
You Are the One You’ve Been Waiting For - IFS Book by Richard Schwartz
I dated someone once who said that his dad read a book once in a blue moon but then would talk about that book incessantly. I feel like that is how I am with books lol, I finish one book that I really love and shout it from the roof tops! This book I actually just started haha but it already resonates with me so deeply with where I am in my healing journey.
The concepts might not be that novel on the surface but I feel like he brings a lot of depth to these things that people talk about often. The book is about our conditioning around love and how putting all of our needs from childhood onto our partners is basically a recipe for not being able to actually love our partner fully. He also talks about how our culture plays into it, which I always love thinking about it.